If this blog has been in incubation for several years, I’ve been in labour with it for several months now.
It’s been fully-grown and ready to meet the world for quite some time, but truth is I’ve been too scared to publish.
Putting yourself out there is scary, even for something you believe about so deeply. And I do, care deeply about the core subject of this blog, body positivity.
I hit puberty when I was 9. By age 12 I had bigger boobs than my mom had ever had. Finding off-the-rail clothes has always been difficult, and more difficult still was hearing my body shape described as ‘difficult’.
As a result, I imposed on myself a lifetime of dark colours and small variations in style, always too scared to wear anything different in case I drew too much attention to myself. No heels because they make me feel like a hippo balancing on toothpicks. Nothing trendy, because then I’d look like I was making an effort, and that would just be embarrassing. I’ve dieted and worked out, and been heavier and lighter, but how I’ve felt about myself has never really changed.
And it never will, unless I change the way I think.
I look around, and see women in all different shapes and sizes, and think how beautiful they are. Why can’t I be so kind to myself?
So, here I begin. This is what I got, and I’m going to learn how to rock it. No more hiding in the same A-line black dress. I want to learn to feel good in my body, no matter what size it is.
And hopefully, as I do, I’ll find some people on the same journey.
Please share your thoughts and stories with me if you’re in the same boat.
The Girl in The Pearls